Q&A 50

Q. Ok. Ya... But the exchange of vows is like the end of a process or a journey. What I'm asking is how do you get there? And not just for marriage, for any vocation that God may call me even that vocation you keep mentioning that entails me not getting married. How do I know this vocation is where I should put my 100%?

A. That's a tough question if only because it's a very personal question for each of us and God calls each as He wills...

But here goes... your first question: how does one know what vocation or path God wants us to follow? I would say it is a combination of several indicators. And these apply to both the vocation to celibacy - whether it is to become a monk, or a diocesan priest or a non-marrying member of Opus Dei - or to marriage itself.

Because a vocation is quite literally a call from God to follow a specific path, each of us has to persistently ask Him like the boy-child Samuel did: "Lord, what do you want me to do with my life? How do you want me to become a saint and bring others to heaven? Do you want me to start a family and focus on getting my spouse and children to heaven? Do you want me to remain single and thus be more available for whatever work you have in store for me? Speak Lord, your servant listens." This is effectively prayer; and prayer is the first step towards discovering your vocation.

A second step or indicator is your personality. Speak to your mentor or spiritual director and ask him whether you have the human qualities to undertake such and such a vocation. Do I have what it takes to be a faithful husband and a loving father? Do I have what it takes to undertake the celibate path? Keep in mind, Jesus himself refused some to follow one vocation and instead asked them to follow another. St. John for example never got married. Our Lord called him to be an apostle while he was still a teenager; he said yes and never looked back. He is the only apostle we know from tradition who was not married. He's also a very good saint to pray to when you're trying to discover your vocation especially if it seems like God might be asking you to give up the noble vocation to marriage. On the other hand we have that young man who after being exorcised asked Jesus if he could follow him like one of his apostles and our Lord told him no (Mk 5:1-20).

Stay tuned!

2^ndDecember 2015