Q&A 105
Q. Dude! As beautiful as that sounds it also seems highly uncommon a view not to mention terribly difficult in practice.
A. Yes. I agree. But "uncommon" and "difficult" say nothing about the view's truth. You can't logically say you disagree with it, you find it false or incorrect because it is uncommon or because it is difficult.
That aside, the reason I'm happy you are asking these tough and very personal questions is because they help us sort out our ideas on the topic. As we have said before, ideas have consequences; good ideas have good consequences, bad ideas have bad consequences. Good ideas on friendship will lead to good consequences of friendship (on the respective individuals): greater loyalty, more generosity, more spontaneous forgiveness, etc. Bad ideas on friendship will have bad consequences of friendship: more arguments, greater distrust, more impurity, etc. The same applies to all other disciplines e.g. good ideas on cooking will lead to healthier, tastier food; bad ideas on music will lead to noise; good ideas on law will lead to greater justice and order; bad ideas in medicine will lead to more persistent illnesses, pain and unnecessary death, etc.
Q. But is it an absolute rule that a friendship that can end never really begun?
A. To be honest, I don't know.
On the one hand the rule of the gift is clear: gifts are for good not for a while. Friendship is clearly a gift. On the other hand, life's experiences tell us there are times when it is prudent to end some friendships.
Q. So how do we sort out this contradiction?
A. Let's begin with the first consideration: friendship is a gift. This is precisely why in friendship we instinctively keep giving: gifts, advice, assistance but most importantly time.
Q. Wait. Why "most importantly time"?
A. Because time is perhaps the only thing you can give on this earth and never get back whatever you try. Any time you give is always a perfect gift in this regard. For this reason it is also the most precious and most instinctively valued in any relationship, whether between parents and children, between siblings, between spouses or between friends.
End of Part 3
Hasta luego!
5th August 2016