Intro

The ancients would say there are 7 questions that every man should ask himself.  The one that concerns us now is “who am I”?

As should be clearer to you by now, self-knowledge is fundamental to growing in manliness.  Attempting to grow in manliness, engaging in the battles to improve in body, in mind and in soul without knowing yourself is futile.  It is like joining a competitive match where you don’t know who your teammates are, who the opponent is, what the rules of the game are, what position you’re playing or what your strengths or weaknesses are.

There are generally only two sources of self-knowledge: self and others, i.e. what you can learn about yourself from yourself, and what others can teach you about yourself.

Short Exercise 16:

  1. What activity in your typical day (or week) facilitates you learning more about yourself from yourself?
  2. Who is the one friend (or perhaps two or three friends) who consistently teach you more about the good things and the not-so-good things about yourself?

Commentary

Learning more about yourself from yourself essentially boils down to reflecting on your experiences:

  1. thinking about places you messed up and areas you succeeded in;
  2. figuring out why you failed in areas you messed up in, or why you so easily succeeded in those other areas;
  3. planning how you can improve (reduce the failures, and grow the successes).

For you who are after a solid manliness, this should be a daily habit.  Some people call it self-evaluation, others the (personal) examination of conscience. It can take as short as 3 minutes. Important thing is that it is brutally sincere and that it is daily.

Learning about yourself from others boils down to either a good, solid friend (or friends), or else a good solid mentor (or spiritual director or life coach).  More on this later.

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